Ideal UPSC exam selection list

  1. Let the computer program check the name, Aadhaar number, address carefully. Any mistake, the candidate is out.
  2. Look for all swear words in all languages in the above fields, if present the candidate is out. Especially candidates from Naxalite movement states or people who didn’t vote for Modiji or both.
  3. Check old police records, school teachers’ references. Any comment protests too much, talks too much, is disgruntled ,the candidate is out.
  4. Merge with list of “Candidates.” Names listed in that list in bold letters.
  5. Select all those bold lettered name, make them normal letters again so that nobody can catch us, and (200 – number of bold lettered names) names randomly.
  6. For the rest 5,00,000 names send out the letters”We were extemely impressed. Unfortunately number of candidates vastly exceeds our capacity. We with great reluctance have to look for next year. We will keep your application in file for any other suitable opportunity. We are happy that candidates like you are determined to help India. India needs people like you to beat prime enemies like China. Jai Hind.” and “Note: If you apply within 15 days to the classes, you will get a voucher for 5% not 10% discount on next year’s exam. Have a printed signature that looks like real one.” And have a thunder storming laugh. After having a beer. Or after having a rasam dosa. With extra chutney.

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